What is the best dream you’ve ever had? Recount it for us in all its ethereal glory. If no dream stands out in your memory, recount your worst nightmare. Leave no frightening detail out.
When I was a kid, my brother and I were obsessed with The Power Rangers. Especially the original series and cast, The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. We watched this show every Saturday morning and for more than one Halloween, we dressed up as certain Power Rangers. Once I was the Pink Ranger and he was the Green Ranger and another year I was possibly the Green Ranger while he was the Black Ranger. And so it was only natural that we were very big fans of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie (1995). I’ve probably seen that movie at least 15 times. One of those times was less than two years ago. Yes, I still watch that movie. It’s great and I regret nothing.
So with all of these Powered up teenagers filling my waking hours, it was only right for them to seep into my dreams. And that they did. The dream took place during the scene where the Rangers are on the island of Thedos (or how ever you spell/pronounce that) and were told by the mysterious attractive warrior chick Dulcea that they would have to reach this mystical Great Power in order to save Zordon. The scene in the dream takes place when they’re in the woods battling the skeletons of long deceased dinosaurs and other creatures who are trying to prevent them from accessing the Great Power. In the dream, I’m watching them battle these creatures and I watch them discover the Great Power and become awesome ninja warrior Rangers (although not to be confused by the series Power Rangers Ninja Storm, which was my third favorite Power Ranger Series, coming right after my 2nd favorite, Power Rangers in Space).
It might not seem like much of a dream because it’s simply replaying a scene that I’ve seen many times in my head, but what’s especially interesting about this dream is I’ve had it multiple times. It’s the exact dream every time (I slightly know how Harry felt when he kept having the same dream about Voldemort being in a creepy not fully formed body in The Goblet of Fire). I can remember having this dream at least 4 times in probably the last 15 years. What’s even more interesting is not only do I feel like I’ve had de ja vu after I wake up, but it came to a point where I realized I was having de ja vu within the dream. I didn’t necessary realize that I was in a dream, but I definitely realized that I had been in that same situation before.
The last time I had this dream was about 2 years ago and it makes me super happy every time. It reminds me of my childhood and how much fun I used to have. It also makes me want to watch the Power Rangers movie again. So naturally, this is my favorite dream.
***On a completely random note, did anyone besides my brother and I realize that in the original series the Black Ranger was played by an African American male and the Yellow Ranger was played by an Asian female? And then they go and change it up in the movie and not only replace those two actors, but suddenly the Black Ranger is now played by an Asian male and the Yellow Ranger is now played by a African American female? I’m still not sure if this was deliberate or supposed to be ironic. Either way, I find it slightly funny. Oh the glory of the 90’s.***
You’re 12 years old. It’s your birthday. Write for ten minutes on that memory. GO.
It’s the year two thousand and three
and there’s nothing good on tv
I can’t help but wonder
If it’s because of the thunder
Or the ever falling powder
As my shouts get louder
There are people around
But my ear’s to the ground
Hoping and wishing
That I’m not just fishing
For clues as to when
The gift wrapping began
But I might just think
Are we all going to shrink
Year after year
Until I can have that beer
For all of our selves
Go from eleven to twelve
Imagine that tomorrow, all of your duties and obligations evaporate for the day. You get the day all to yourself, to do anything you please. What types of fun activities would make your day?
This is an easy one.
My day to myself would include tv, books, and movies. I would start the morning by binging on television on Netflix, then I would take the afternoon to book browse at Barnes and Noble and I would end the day at the movies.
I really just want to do that every day. 😀
You. We know *you* are vice-free, dear Daily Post reader. But, or perhaps we should say, “butt,” others around you and in your life are riddled with vices: they smoke; they eat too much celery; they hog the covers; they can’t keep their hands out of the office candy bowl. Which vice or bad habit can you simply not abide in others?
For anyone who is familiar the film The Internship and it’s hilarity and greatness, then you’re obviously familiar with the character of Yo-Yo Santos. Yo-Yo Santos has a very bad habit and a very overbearing mother. Whenever he feels stressed or feels like he’s not living up to his potential or basically his mother speaks to him as if he’s not good enough, he ends up punishing himself by picking out his eyebrows. By the end of the film-*spoiler*-he has only one eyebrow but he also finally-*another spoiler*- stands up to his mother and earns some much deserved respect.
This character in particular makes me think about the reasons we might have for forming bad habits. There’s always a reason for doing the things we do, but we don’t always know why we do them. For example, I randomly pick at my eyebrows. However, I still have both of mine and I think I just like the feel of them more than anything. If that’s not weird to say. Another bad habit of mine is cracking my knuckles. I don’t know when I started or why I started but I can’t stop and it’s a problem. I have the fear that I’m going to get arthritis or something in the future and yet, I still do it because most of the time I don’t even realize that I’m doing it. It’s just out of habit now. Just now I had to physically stop myself from cracking them. I’ve gone through periods where I’ve stopped cracking them and I feel really accomplished. For a time. Even if I can go for a week or two without cracking them, something happens to my body and I’m suddenly off the wagon again.
I don’t know why I do these things and I don’t know why other people have bad habits either. Maybe they understand theirs better than I do. But I’m just not gonna question it. I’m too busy trying not to destroy my joints further.
So uh yeah. Bye.
My mom constantly tells me that I watch too much television. This 23 year old disagrees, of course. Too much tv is not a thing. Not enough tv is not a thing either. Tv is just tv. It’s there to entertain us and entertain us it does. It also becomes incredibly irksome at times and it makes me want to throw things at walls or crawl into a corner and cry.
But I know for a fact that I do watch A LOT of tv. Not too much but A LOT. And so of course I always have plenty of things to say about the shows that I watch but I don’t always have someone to talk to about it. Not everyone I know watches the same things I do. My mother obviously doesn’t otherwise she wouldn’t think I spent too much time in front of a big screen. She does, however, watch some of the same things that I do (and that’s usually because I inadvertently get her sucked in to a show, like I happened to do last night) and it’s always nice to chat with her about it.
But since I don’t have people around who watch everything I do, I’m just gonna chat about the current state of all my shows on my own. But be forewarned. I tend to drop a lot of swears when I am passionate or extremely irked about something, so please don’t be offended by multiple versions of the word “fuck”,”shit”. Those words are sometimes the only thing that will help get my true feelings across. They’re very powerful words. Seriously, the F word is my absolute favorite swear word.
Okay here we go. I’m going to mention the shows that are currently airing as of this moment or are on their midseason breaks or have just recently finished their seasons. I’m also going to go through the days of the week that these shows air so it’s easier to keep track of. This could get pretty long (I’m serious when I say I watch a lot of tv).
- Once Upon a Time: I loved season 1 because I loved finding out who all of the people in Storybrook actually were in Fairytale land. However, I kind of hated season 2. I found it to be slightly boring. It just wasn’t as fun when everybody knew that they were fairytale characters and there just wasn’t that much mystery anymore. But I didn’t give up on the huge potential for greatness that this show has and I’m really glad I didn’t. Season 3 is kicking some serious ass. I had a total blast with the first half of season 3 and the entire Find-Henry-In-Neverland-And-Destroy-Peter-Pan plot. It was brilliant and perfect. I’m super excited for what the 2nd half of the season brings. 7/10
- The Walking Dead: This show is fucking amazing. It really is and I’m sure that you can tell by my side image on my little blurb that I am forever a fan of this show. It keeps getting better and better. There were a few times where things seemed to drag in the show. When the characters had found a safe place and they were just living life. It honestly wasn’t all that entertaining in the midst of a zombie apocalypse. But then there will be moments when the rug is pulled out from under you and shit hits the fan. Those moments are completely and totally worth it. I always tell myself that if Daryl Dixon gets killed off I will not only riot but I will stop watching the show. He is my favorite character but even if he does die (which I am crossing my shaking fingers that he doesn’t) I don’t even think that mourning his death will be able to stop me from watching this fantastic show. My only wish is for Rick to trim that beard. Seriously, dude. I know the world has ended but that doesn’t mean you have to be lax about personal hygiene. 8/10
- Sherlock: I have two things to say about Sherlock. Benedict Cumberbatch. That is all. That is why I watch the show and it really helps that the writing is fantastic and all of the other actors are fantastic and it’s just fantastic. Okay, that was more than two words but seriously, this show is fantastic. I can’t wait for series 4. 8/10
- Downton Abbey: This show is always entertaining. I never thought I would love a show about a rich british family so much. There is so much drama and so much wit that you can’t help but wish to dress up like them and sit at their table for dinner. 9/10
- Teen Wolf: This show is fucking brilliant (and every single person is gorgeous). Anyone who says otherwise doesn’t know what they’re missing. The writing is witty, intricate and delves into ancient mythologies that I have never heard of before. Plus, the acting is spot on. Dylan O’Brien deserves every award there has ever been awarded to a television actor and then deserves ones to be made up just so he can win them. I am not even exaggerating. Every character introduced to this show is worth your time. You can’t always say that about shows but you can for this one. Even if they’re on just one episode or die after a few episodes, they are there for a reason and they kick some major ass. This show (and especially this 3rd season) is perfect and I will never stop loving it. (However, loving this show will not make me like the Michael J. Fox movie. That movie is just ridiculous. Who wants to play basketball with a teen Wolf? Not me. I’d rather play La Crosse with one) 10/10
- Sleepy Hollow: This was a new show that started last fall and I am really glad I gave it a chance. It’s really interesting and mysterious and had so much more going for it then I thought it would. I was pleasantly surprised by this show and I can’t wait for it to come back. Also, I always love having a new SHIP to get on board with. 9/10
- The Fosters: Before I watch a new episode of this show I end up asking myself “why I’m watching this”? But then I watch the episode and am reminded why. It’s different. Number one, that’s what it has going for it. And I don’t just mean the fact that it’s main adult couple are lesbians, who also happen to be an interracial couple. True, you hardly see that on tv (and I’m super glad that a different family unit is being represented) but that isn’t the only thing that this show is about. It shows foster kids. That’s something that we don’t usually get insight into. Sure, we hear how bad the Foster System is but we don’t always get to see how great it can be when these kids find the right home. That’s what keeps me watching. 8/10
- The Mindy Project: The best fucking show ever. My god. Mindy Kaling is my hero (along with Fey and Poehler) who know show to get it done. This show is wicked funny and simply fantastic. I love seeing a show about a successful womon of color whose only problem in life is her love life. She has a great apartment, a great job, great friends and coworkers, she knows who she is and only rides the struggle bus when it comes to managing the men in her life (that’s what I want my life to be like). It’s brilliant and I want it to last forever. 10/10
- Chicago Fire: One word: Brilliant. You get plenty of shows about the law enforcement sector of cities but you don’t usually get an insight into those fighting fires. I’ve learned so much about being a fire fighter from this show and just how insane this job is. I wouldn’t want to do it myself but I applaud those that do. We owe them so much. And Tyler Lockwood’s deceased uncle and Lady Gaga’s current boyfriend is so gorgeous on that show and in general. 9/10
- The Originals: I knew this show would be brilliant and I was not wrong (and that’s not always the reaction you get from the prospect of a spin-off). It’s even better than I could have dreamed it would be. I mean, an entire show dedicated the oldest and, not to mention, hottest vampires in history? What’s not to love? Well, that stupid witch Sophie for one. She should just go die. I hate her with a fiery passion. I even hate her more than I hate Bonnie on The Vampire Diaries. And that’s really saying something. Maybe I just dislike witches who didn’t receive their education at Hogwarts. I guess I’m just biased. I’m just really glad it got picked up for a 2nd season. 7/10
- Supernatural: This show never ceases to amaze and entertain me. The Three Musketeers that are Sam, Dean and Cas will always be my favorite threesome. That is all. This show is fantastic and great and I am beyond excited that it got renewed for a 10th season. It is well deserving. (Destiel lives) I’m not sure how I feel about the prospect of spin-off from this show but the good news is is that no one from the main show will be going over there and subsequently ruining everyone’s lives (and not in a good way) 8/10
- Awkard: Whoever does the writing for this show deserves an award or at least more recognition. This is one of those shows that seems to be under the radar and it really shouldn’t be. It should be all over that radar. There is so much high school drama but it’s the perfect amount that it doesn’t seem unrealistic and it is wicked funny. I love all of those characters even with they’re being huge bitches or seem bat-shit crazy. . It just makes everything so much more entertaining. 8/10
- Pretty Little Liars: Don’t get me wrong, I love this show to pieces. But it’s beginning to feel really dragged out (and it’s doesn’t seem to be a great as it used to be). I mean, I just really need to know if Ezra is really A and then I can continue to live my life. If he’s A, I have no idea what I’m going to do but at least I’ll know where to go from here. I just really want to know if he tried to kill Alison and is therefore a sexy murderer or just a hot guy with a thing for underage girls. I just need to know!!! 7/10
- Ravenswood: Complete and utter shit. Seriously, this is the shittiest show I’ve watched in a long time. I didn’t care about anyone on that show, even Caleb. But that was because he was only great when he was in Rosewood with Hanna which is exactly where he needs to go. He needs to get his shit together and get back to Rosewood. Same with the actor who plays him. He had a great gig going on PLL and he gave it up to be on this shitty spin-off. Get your shit together Tyler Blackburn! 2/10
- Twisted: I’m still giving this show a chance. It’s interesting and I like the characters. The plot is kind of interesting, I guess. But now that we know the real truth about what happened with Danny and his aunt and the whole Regina Crane murder things aren’t nearly as mysterious. But I’m going to keep watching it with the hopes that things will get better and that Rico will get some much deserved action. 7/10
- Chicago PD: Now this is one spin-off that deserves your attention. Seriously, it is amazing. Just simply amazing and everyone is sexy as hell so that’s always a plus. There’s action, there’s sexual tension, there’s just tension. It’s perfect. Still deciding if I like it better than Chicago Fire or not. 9/10
- Arrow: I just started watching this show yesterday and boy, have I been missing out. It is really really entertaining and I can’t wait to binge watch the rest of the season on Netflix and then stress over how I’m going to watch the current season. 9/10
- Parks and Recreation: Such an amazing show. So beyond amazing. I want Leslie Knope to be my best friend so I can spend time with her and have her call my a precious naive baby bird and then introduce me to everyone at the Parks & Rec department. That cast are all gods in my book. Every single one of them is perfect and amazing and wonderful and everything in between. 10/10
- Glee: There are a few things I have to say about Glee. This is one of my favorite shows. It deals with so much and it does it with song. I love that. But, I think it’s time to call it quits. The shows just isn’t what it used to be. Once everyone graduated it just became too much to handle and it just wasn’t the same. I love everyone on the show (especially Klaine, they will forever be my OTP) and I will continue to watch it until the end but I think it’s time is up. Especially now that the rest of the gang will be graduating. It’s just….I am, however, super pumped for the 100th episode and can’t wait to see the old cast members come back. 7/10
- The Vampire Diaries: This show really knows how to push it’s limits and it does so in a way that is entertaining and wonderful and sexy. But it also tends to go back to the same themes that originally drove the show, which is fine, but it’s not really the same show anymore. Too many things have changed for characters to go back to how they used to be. Especially Damon. I’m actually really sick of him retreating into his bad vamp ways every time something happens with Elena that he doesn’t like. It’s really annoying and he needs to find a better outlet for his pain. It’s obviously not working for him. I used to really want Stelena to be resurrected but it really no longer seems plausible. I kinda just want Stefan and Caroline to get it on and then I can be happy. Also, have Bonnie go on a long vacation somewhere. Get that witch out of here. 7/10
- White Collar: Matt Bomer’s face is the reason I started watching this show and the plot and character development has kept me watching. There are so many twists and turns and so many cons that it’s sometimes hard to keep up. But it never gets boring. I love this show so much and it’s so intense that I never remember which season it’s currently on. Was this 5 or 6? I think it was 5….whatever. I’ll be watching the new season. 8/10
- Dracula: This is another new show that started in the fall and I was really excited about it when I saw the promos and things. The first few episodes were really good and I was entertained but I slowly started becoming less interested and found it to be slightly boring at times. Also I really really hated Jonathan Rhys Meyers switching between an American accent and a British accent on the show. It was annoying and his American accent is just really annoying. No honey. Just stop. Stick to what you know and that is your silky British accent you do so well even though you’re Irish. 6/10
- Haven: I’m going to mention this show only because I recently started binging on it and because the 3rd season finale was just this past December so it’s still relevant. I love this show. It’s so entertaining and strange that it’s hard not to love it. Plus Duke Crocker is the greatest person on the face of the earth and that character will keep me watching no matter how insane it gets. Also, I’m really excited that it got renewed for a 4th season. Wahooo! 8/10
So that’s my television gist of things right now and all of my feels about the current state that these shows are in.
There are plenty of people, myself included, who want to meet someone famous. In fact, they also happen to have particular famous people in mind that they want to meet. And it’s just suddenly dawned on me the real reason why we want to meet these famous people. Whether they’re an film/tv actor, an opera singer, an athlete, a comedian, a Broadway star, an Olympian, a musician, a chef, a talk show host, a novelist, a director, etc. the reason we want to, I mean really want to, meet these people is because they are special. They are special in the most grand way possible. They have achieved what they’ve been placed on this earth to do and they just happen to have done in front of the entire world. They have not only discovered what they are good at, have even praised for it in amazing ways, but they also make a living exuding their special talent. So many people spend their entire lives trying to discover what they’re good at and strive even harder to be able to support themselves while doing it. Some people never discover what they’re good at and end up settling on almost everything in their lives. But famous people, famous people have made it and we’ve all been witness to them “making it”. I think what our true goal in meeting someone famous is to achieve the feeling of being “special”. If you meet someone famous then you immediately become special yourself. I see it as “meeting someone special makes you special”. And I think all we really want from this life is to, in some way, feel special. To feel like we can accomplish something. Something that we have worked hard for and care deeply and intensely about. Famous people have achieved that and we just want a little part of that.
I know for a fact that when I meet a favorite musician (which I’ve done a handful of times) I immediately feel special because of it. Just being in the atmosphere of the accomplished and getting the chance to speak to them on a human-to-human level makes you feel accomplished. It makes you feel special. I don’t think anyone goes to a concert and waits patiently for the possible chance to meet someone from the band, or who waits outside the stage door after a play or musical hoping to meet the lead, or goes to a book signing in order to speak to the author of their favorite book, does so because they want to be made to feel terrible about the things they haven’t yet accomplished or striven for. They do it because they want to be around a person who has made something of their lives and has done so successfully.
There are of course those people who think that others want to meet someone famous in order to have their fifteen minutes of fame. I know there are people out there that do that, but I believe there are more people out there who don’t. I believe that there are tons of people who believe in their hearts that meeting someone special will somehow rub off on them and as a result, make them special. I mean, who doesn’t want to feel special? Who doesn’t want to feel accomplished or successful? I know I do. I would sure as hell feel accomplished and special if I could say “Hey, random person! I just met Tom Hiddleston!” or “Hey, friend! I just saw friggin Matt Lauer walking by!” I would shout those things from the rooftops if they were true. But I would also feel special by being able to do what I wanted to do. Doing something I know I’m good at and can make my life better because of it.
I truly think that that is the real reason people have the desire to meet a famous person. Especially a person they look up to. I think we should do anything and everything to make ourselves feel special and good. Doing what you love is special. Being a part of something special makes you special in return. You just have to go out there and find it.
Today is your lucky day. You get three wishes, granted to you by The Daily Post. What are your three wishes and why?
We all wish for a lot of things, myself included. I think we wish for things when we don’t even realize we’re wishing for them. I find that when people wish for things, it’s because they want things to be different then how they really are. They wish for things to be different because life just isn’t working out how they expected or wanted at the particular moment. To me, wishing for things just means that we want what we don’t have or, more often than not, what we can’t have. Like love or friendship or I don’t know…happiness. I guess that sometimes, our wishes for things come out of nowhere and we don’t always realize why we’re wishing for those things in the first place. We just simply wish…
I wish to love or be loved without questioning it. That doesn’t necessarily seem that hard but sometimes there’s that little voice in your head that whispers things that makes you second guess yourself. Sometimes I find myself with feelings for someone and I start asking myself, “why do I even like this person”? I always tell one of my friends that I don’t believe in love at first sight (which I don’t believe I do) but I would have to be crazy not to believe in lust at first sight. Seeing someone is what draws you to them. Their personality isn’t usually the first thing you notice. It’s not like it’s screaming at you or something, although in some cases it is. Depends on the person. But what I guess I’m hoping to get out of this wish is ultimately to be free of uncertainty. Obviously not uncertainty about life because life will always be uncertain and we have no control over that. And we might not have control over our feelings (we don’t have control really) but we can control our reactions to those feelings. I wish to not second guess my feelings for someone else and not second guess someone else having true feelings for me. Even writing that sounds ludicrous because I always feel like someone would be ridiculous to have feelings towards me. See? That’s why I need to wish to be true.
I wish to become a published author. This one seems pretty self-explanatory but I really really want this. I want people to be able to read what I write and I want them to feel something because of it. I always take away so much from words and I feel it’s only right to be able to give a little bit of that back. I want to move someone to tears, I want to make someone laugh out loud. I want someone to read my writing late into the night and not have the ability to put it down even if their eyelids no longer have the strength to do the same. I’ve experienced all of these things and more from books and I want to be able to do this for other people. It’s all I really want.
I wish to be happy. It’s not that I’m not happy right now. I am. Or at least I think I am. I’m sometimes in the state of being happily unhappy. Right now, I suppose, I’m content. But there’s always something more that we want from our lives and what we expect from ourselves. I certainly want more and I expect more. I’m getting there though. I think happiness is something that we’re always striving towards. It’s not necessarily unreachable but it’s not always right in the palm of your hand.
This just in: let’s pretend that science has proven that karma is a thing. Your words and actions will influence what happens to you in the future. How (if at all) will you change your ways?
Just this morning I was watching an episode of Parenthood (S3Ep8- “In-Between”) and Kristina Braverman, who had been worrying herself sick about her son Max’s social skills and the other kids at school- Max has aspergers (a high functioning form of autism)-, saw that some boys at school were asking Max math questions just to make fun of the way he worked through the problems (he would make a lot of hand gestures and worked through the math out loud). This immediately made Kristina angry but she wasn’t sure how she could deal with the problem. What made it harder for her was that Max didn’t even seem to be aware that he was being made fun of. So near the end of the episode, after multiple times having witnessed this bullying, she went and talked to the boy who was making fun of her son at school. She mentioned to him who she was and whose mom she was (avoiding stranger danger obviously) and basically told the boy that what he was doing was wrong and that although Max might not realize he was being made fun of, didn’t mean that it was okay to do it. She ended her little speech with “be a friend, not a bully” and then proceeded to run to her car because other teachers witnessed this and she didn’t want to cause more trouble.
I saw this little ordeal as a slight form of good karma or at least a better form of Karma. Even though this boy was being a bully to Max and wanted other people to join him when he teased Max, this kids karma shouldn’t have necessarily been to have other kids make fun of him. It’s not always “what goes around comes around”. Sometimes it’s just “what goes around”. This kid was upset that Max was better at him in math and wanted people to instead see how weird Max was in order to feel better about himself. What Kristina did, talking to the bully and informing him of things he might not have been aware of and not calling his parents, showed this boy more about karma than anything else could have. If Kristina had called his parents, this kid would probably have been even more inclined to make fun of Max because he was mad about getting in trouble. But instead Kristina talked to him on level ground and didn’t act as if she knew better than him simply because she was an adult. This kid was a bully but more bullying doesn’t solve anything. It just perpetuates it. This kid received his Karma in a way that would help him grow instead of make him feel down or make him more angry. He was told what he did wrong and now it is up to him to decide whether or not to make a change from that.
Karma can damage you but it can also cause you to grow. So all I have to say is “be a friend, not a bully” because your Karma could be much worse than this kids Karma.
If you were involved in a movie, would you rather be the director, the producer, or the lead performer? (Note: you can’t be the writer!).
If I were involved in a movie, I would love to be the director. Similar to being the writer, the director has the ability to make their vision come to life and this time it just happens to be on the big screen. As the director, I would have the ability to make the film exactly the way I wanted it. I could choose how each scene was shot, where the actors were positioned when they delivered their lines, what the background would look like and whether or not I needed extras in the scene. Being the director, I would not have control over the story (unless I also happened to write the story) but I would have control over how the story was portrayed. The vision would be entirely my own and I would be able to show audiences exactly what I wanted. Being the director would, in a way, show audiences exactly what was going on in my head (and that’s one of things I love most about writing).
For this week’s challenge, use one of the images in this gallery as a starting point for a short story, poem, free-write, or musing on whatever you’d like.
I can see it.
I can see everything around me. It’s dark and damp and unwelcoming. I’ve heard this all before. Many times before. You say things to me so I’ll listen. But you’re never actually listening. The walls are closing in. Concealing my mind and body inside. There is no way out. There is no way to escape from your wicked tongue. You’re constantly spewing words at me. Because God doesn’t only know that I love words. You voice calls to me in the darkness. It echoes slowing and surely in my mind. It pulls me further into the shadows. I know what’s waiting for me there but I can’t prevent myself from moving. I’m always moving. Always in motion. It’s hard to put a stop to a habit. I’ve never been one to do things cold turkey. I strive to push your voice away. Push it deeper and deeper into the back of my mind. So far back that I can no longer hear it. I wish to let you go. Wish to let you float away into the sky and trees and never bother me again. I wish for a lot of things. But not all wishes come true. My wishes contradict with your wishes. You wish to tear me down and put me in an empty room. You wish for me to be alone. Wallowing in my own dark self-pity. But I won’t let you take over. I can’t let you take over. Because once you do there is no going back. You might always be there in the back of my mind but that won’t stop me from letting go. It won’t stop me from attempting to forget the impossible. I believe I can change this empty room. This dark and daunting hallway. I don’t have to be alone. I don’t have to want to escape. I can make it anything I want. I can be anything I want. But you constantly try and stop me. You’re always there with a harsh image or a blunt word. I can’t escape the voices. Your voice in particular. I can’t escape the sound forming around the words “different”.
I can see it.
Every minute of every day. It’s always in front of my face and the faces of the ones who are most dear to me. Your voice has entered their heads as well. It’s whispering to them in the night. It’s telling them things that they didn’t want to know. It’s telling me the same thing. There are other voices that try and stand up to you. Try and tell you that you’re wrong and that we’re all wonderfully, extraordinary individuals. But your voice is strong. It’s imbedded in the heads of every single person on this earth. Every day is a struggle. Every day is a constant battle against you and your powerful friends. It doesn’t help that you have a consistent daily supply of anguish, fear, and uncertainly to fuel you.
But I can see it. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. You may make people feel empty and alone and afraid. But no one will ever feel as empty as your 1,000 empty words.